Time to Say YES to the Terrible Twos

Just Say YES – Clearing Your Terrible Two!

Imagine gaining a new mastery of language and breaking through in communication skills; imagine feeling control over your body in a whole new and empowering way; imagine connecting deeply with yourself and the important people in your life; envision the experience of seeing infinite possibilities and courageously exploding into the world with abounding energy like a super-hero!  You have known ALL these experiences intimately, along with the desire and the belief that you can have everything and be anything!   This is a gift, given to all newcomers to the human race–at about age two.  We know it.  It is us.

Even if you do not have an extraordinary memory, those experiences of learning, mastery, courage, resilience, independence, and optimism, can be observed in most two-year olds.  This is when weary parents are forced to teach boundaries, politeness, and limitations.  Those of us who loved, cared for, or “tolerated” a new being in the second year of life understand the reality of the title:  Terrible Twos.  It is a “No, No, No” experience for everyone. 

Experts look at our first developmental years as the most powerful in creating our self-image and the foundation for our adult life.  As Brian Orr, M.D.  and Donna Raskin say of age two: 

The description of this period as terrible traditionally refers to the two-year-old’s penchant to say “No!” and to demand that things go exactly the way the child wants.  And although such petulant behavior can create problems for both parent and child, it marks an important stage in your child’s development: the achievement of a budding independence.  For, in reality, this second year is a remarkable time indeed, centered around a curiosity-driven recognition of one’s self and of the development of interests.”  p. 1, The Everything Guide to Raising a Two-Year-Old, Orr & Raskin, F &W Publications Company, 2007. 

This time of “no” went deep into our psyches –repeated many times per day, at a critical time, by the most powerful and important people in our lives.  It is a normal experience for us to get (and give) a daily dose of “no” during this time.  Thereafter, many of us work very hard to regain independence and an awareness of infinite possibilities, of perfect optimism; some of us stay safe in the certainty of “no” for the rest of our lives.

Now that you have survived childhood, it is time to reclaim your “Yes” and to release conditioning and retrain ingrained habitual responses.  We must be equally powerful in our “Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes” experience!  And in so doing require repetition, momentum, and reinforcement.  Keep in mind that one whole year of work would be the best response, yet, it is also commonly known that 30 days can turn any routine into a life-long habit.

Six-Steps to Reclaiming Your “Terrific Two” Energy:

Repetition

  • Once per hour stand up and shout* – YES, YES, YES!

    • *You may also write, whisper, or think “YES” silently –TEN TIMES per hour
    • Reinforce this with an action, such as standing, nodding, clapping, or tapping fingers together.
  • Each time a “no” “not” “can’t” thought comes in, imagine your mother or father patting you on the head or giving you a big hug saying — YES, YES, YES!
  • Reinforce this with an action such as patting yourself on the head or giving a hug to your favorite person or pet.

Momentum

  • Each morning take a 15 minute power walk, pump yourself up with YES energy and gratitude

    • Reinforce with thoughts of your blessings or by singing a happy song
  • Slowly drink a glass of pure water ten minutes before each meal

    • Feel your readiness for nourishment
    • Feel the blessing and safety of abundance in the universe for you
    • Envision your body’s power and beauty
    • Feel the joy,  enthusiasm and love for others oozing out of your aura

Reinforcement

  • Enlist one or two significant others to give you hugs, pats, and kisses each day

    • Saying your name and yes, and offering sincere words of appreciation
    • 10 times will be perfect
  • Enlist partnership with someone who also wants to reclaim “Terrific Two” energy

    • Check-in each day with a 30 day count-down
    • Check-in with me each day via e-mail, and I will support your goal

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Article by Susan Miller Madeley

Authors bio is coming up shortly.

One Comments

  1. Susan Miller Madeley says:

    Dear Katheleen,
    Thank you for your comment – and anticipation. I ran this in the summer – perhaps it is time for a winter run?
    Loving You Now! Susan

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